Not many would know that I felt shame when I first came out as Transgender.
I lost nearly everything and the unconditional love from my daughters and a few close friends kept me going.
I’m standing over a word in this photo that means so much theses days to me.
As part of Bulldog Pride I helped a bit with some of the details for the Pride Game with things like suggesting Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Intersex Liaison Officers (GLLOs)
Standing there tonight looking at it meant so much.
#Shame is a painful emotion responding to a sense of failure to attain some ideal state and it encompasses you entirely. The thought process that I wanted to hide, to disappear or even to die.
For years, I tried to love myself. The more I tried, the harder it became. Why is allowing ourselves to do that so hard?
I was so afraid to go to #football games as a spectator. I just felt I was asking for trouble. I remember being outed on a train ride home while I stood with my daughters trying to distract them from being affected.
But now as I stood there tonight staring at a banner. Many of you see crepe paper and plastic but I see so much more and am filled with pride and honour as I helped a club create something a group for people to feel included and safe that means so much to so many for generations to come.
So I am proud of myself. I am proud for the work that I put in to change from a damaged person into the strong woman I am today.
Proud Mama Mish tonight 💋❤️